"On the Mend"

I was told today that I am back "on the mend," which is a phrase I hear often. As much as I hate getting the infections, at least I seem to be fighting them off. The short term goals are to be discharged by the end of this week, get the gut GVHD under control, and continue with the immunosuppressant taper. Once the drugs are issued at a more manageable rate, my immune system can kick in, which will serve as a major catalyst towards physical progression.

I may have mentioned this prior, but because of the situation I am in a completely different ward. Yes, I am fighting off the desire to go ballistic and rant incessantly, I am constantly biting my tongue as I try to remember that we all make mistakes, and I am again confronted with the disparity among personnel quality. Nevertheless, I am in a unique position to demonstrate my faith to people whom I never would have met before. It would be a severe waste of my cancer to sit here in anger, complaining and yelling at the staff like some other belligerent patients that I hear throughout the night. That does not help the patient, the nurse, and it certainly does not make others comfortable.

At any rate, I need to get out of here and fast. For another few weeks, my days will likely be long with multiple appointments; however, sleeping at home is much more preferable than "sleeping" at the hospital.